Did You Know?

Did you know I’d know?
Did you know I’d know and fade cell by cell?
Did you know I’d fade and fade?
Could you’ve guessed
the consequence of diseasing the pact
cell by cell?
Did you know I’d cease
and know I dream of ceasing,
Nightly?
Nightly fading, nightly dying, nightly drying each cell in disease.
Did you know I’d be here, your disease-filled purgatory,
and I’d not cease to disease cell by cell?
Did you know I’d know this withering, this banishment
from what was?
Never that again.
Never me.
Never knowing I’d know what you know.
I didn’t know its possibility exists.
This putrid route,
this hellish dream,
this disease rack.
Self: where?
Or ‘when?’
We’re left with the flesh fragrance
of yesterday’s frolick
and tomorrow’s work.
Did I know this?
Did you know?